22/10/2010

I was really quite ill all day, and being stuck in bed on your own really doesn't help your mood. I read the whole of The Deathly Hallows, 600 odd pages, so i didn't go completely insane as i'm still not sleeping well. My pre-illness plans were to go to my friends birthday party with my boyfriend, but unable to leave the bed it wasn't possible, but as he had no idea i was stuck in bed, i'm assuming the bf still thought we were going to the party, an hour before the party starts ( it takes 30 minutes to get where we were going) i still hadn't heard from him. I try to contact him but it rings and i get the answerphone as always. turns out he'd been on the phone? He said he'd come over in a bit, but 2 hours later, still no show, so i call him, after the 3rd call i finally get in contact, he says he's not coming over, he's already out somewhere else, because he thinks i should get an early night. This upsets me, obviously, i decide to tell him how low i've been feeling lately, and he turns off his phone. Feeling completely worthless i go to bed.

Introduction

Hey All,
Depression affects many people, I personally have been suffering for 2 years now. Living with depression doesn't mean your down all the time, you do get your good days, sometimes for weeks and you get your hopes up that things are getting better, and then it goes back down again.
I find it very difficult, because most people don't understand. My friends, my boyfriend and sometimes even my family make things worse.
People let you down and it makes you feel worse, you're more sensitive. You tell them how bad you feel, open up which is so difficult, and then brush it off. You act how you think people want you to act but no one cares. You let it all out and be the real you and still no one cares.
It's difficult, but there will be an end.